I gave birth to my 2nd beautiful bouncing baby boy in October just before Halloween, so I am 8 weeks postpartum today on Christmas Eve. Things have been going amazingly well up until the past few days. I’m not going to bore you by complaining or talking in great detail about what’s bothering me, but I will talk a little bit about how I’ve been feeling.
The first 2 weeks home were rough, but at the same time,
absolute bliss! I’ve had breastfeeding
issues, but that’s something I’m not 100% ready to discuss yet, so there will
be a different post for that when/if the time comes. But aside from those issues, I was very
happy. This happiness was maybe in part
due to the super heavy narcotics I was on!
Ha! Aside from that, I was on
cloud nine because I FINALLY had my precious little dude and I was able to hold
him and stare at him all day long! It
was great! As the weeks went by, I still
felt super happy despite minor obstacles physically and mentally. I felt like I could take on the world. I did wonder at times if part of this was
some sort of crazy postpartum mania. It
very well could have been. Or maybe it’s
completely normal and all moms go through it.
I really don’t know. The other
great part was that there were zero jealousy issues with my 5 year old
son. He gave my husband some grief by
being a complete stinker and testing him beyond belief, but that’s because his
dad had never been 100% in charge before since I am a stay at home mom and I’m
always here. But lucky for me my husband
stepped up and took over ALL duties with our oldest while I tended to the baby
24-7. My point is that, there weren’t
any major issues. *DS#1 adores his baby
brother. He sings to him and plays with
him and gives him all kinds of hugs and kisses (which has caused us ALL to be
sick twice in an 8 week time span!!!!!!)
Preschool germs are no joke!
So with my husband going back to work in a matter of days,
reality has truly begun to set in. I
will be (for the most part) on my own with 2 little boys! I’m not sure if it’s that fact that has made
a little postpartum depression begin to set in or whether other circumstances
have caused it. I’m predisposed to
postpartum depression now with DS#2 because I had it with DS#1 for 6
months. I happen to believe a lot of
that was circumstantial, though just due to some major family issues we had and
the loss of a dear loved one shortly after DS#1’s birth. This time around, things are literally
blissful as far as circumstances go. My
husband just got a promotion, DS#1 is doing great in school and I’m looking
into going back to school in the fall of 2016.
So I guess the hormonal aspect of things may be getting to me. So I have decided to come up with a “stay in
good spirits” plan and this blog entry is in essence a brainstorm for me to put
together that plan!
What I’ve been told by most every doctor I’ve ever seen is
that exercise is THE best way to combat depression. It makes complete sense to me, because who
doesn’t love that great endorphin rush you get after a good workout! I know I do!
So that’s something to look forward to once I’m feeling up to it. I also plan to get out of the house
daily. Whether it’s a walk or going to
the grocery store or the local Barnes and Noble to write while my oldest is in
school! I love doing that and people
watching! The last idea on my “stay in
good spirits” plan is getting plenty of sleep!
It’s hard to nap when my baby naps because I also have a 5 year old who
is only in partial day preschool. But
getting them both to bed on time and sneaking in cat naps when the hubby is
home will do me wonders, I’m sure!
I definitely have a positive outlook, although I often feel
very down. I can still find the good in
all that I come across. It’s a full on
battle half the time, let me tell you.
And it’s absolutely exhausting at times to fight the negative
thoughts. But I’ll tell you this
much. I’ve been practicing for a few
years now and it used to drain me beyond belief when I first started
trying. I can now say, though it’s a challenge,
it’s gotten much easier. To anyone
reading this who might be dealing with any sort of depression, I have a message
for you. Always work on replacing those
negative thoughts with positive thoughts, don’t be so hard on yourself and know
that you’re not the only one going through depression. You’re never alone.
Oh and one last thing!!!
*DS stands for Dear Son
